THE GIFT OF SEXUAL ENERGY
In order to sensibly discuss the subject of sexuality, we will have to travel back in time. It will come as no surprise to you that sexuality is not a modern phenomenon and the problems that have arisen around it are ancient, varied, and very exotic. To gain a vaster perspective, we will look at what your sexual obligations are. I am not here to lay down 'laws' for sexual behavior. You are responsible for this, just as you are responsible for every law under which you operate.
So, to travel back, we come to a time, past time, as you know it, when your species came to the earth plane, took form, and decided what it wanted to do. At that time you were given 'powers'. The powers you were given are those energies, which you relate to the seven chakras. You have now come to see the energies moving in certain organized patterns, but the powers I am referring to move constantly through
| your Being and were designed to
do certain things. One of them is to think, and one is to feel. When
we speak of sexual energy, we are speaking of one of these powers. You
were given this power and this energy to be used asyou each, individually,
chose to use it. In the beginning, it was not at all separated from
the other bands of energy; there was not much difference between the
drive that impelled you to go out and hunt your prey, and the drive
that impelled you toward a sexual relationship. There was not, in the
beginning, much differentiation.
When the energies moved through all of you many lifetimes ago, each one of you made your own choices, choices that seemed in harmony with who you were and who you wanted to be. Please understand that this lifetime is not your first experience on this planet. You have been on a journey for a very long time. So you have come with certain built-in tendencies from other lifetimes which are "outpictured" through your own being, your own consciousness. These tendencies have produced certain attitudes in you toward sexuality and have become a part of who you are. As you moved through time and space, this energy became a part of your expression and you did with it whatever you willed to do. Sexual energy, like all of the other energies, was meant to be a personal responsibility. It was to be a part of your Beingness of which you could be acutely aware. You were intended to experience your own rightness of feeling and action.
By observation, you learned that your thoughts can bring harmony or disharmony into your life, and you are responsible for what you think. So also are you responsible for how you use your sexual energy. But the days of acknowledging those responsibilities are long gone. Man has constructed codes of behavior on every level of consciousness and you no longer accept your own responsibility. You go to the law, to your rules to tell you what to do, and you think in that way that you can avoid responsibility. Has it worked? Have the sexual codes laid down in the 'dark ages' (under which you are still operating) given you fulfillment? I would suggest that you become aware of your own sexuality, claim your own reality; do the things that make you feel creative, dynamic, alive, loving, positive, exciting, excited. This is your responsibility! If you look to a code to tell you what to do, you will end up being conflicted in your desires. You believe that God cares, in the most minute detail, what you do with your sexuality. But He doesn't care. That is your business. He does not care any more than your neighbor should care. He has only one concern, and that is the quality of your awareness, your power, your love, and your compassion. If you have been following the rules and find yourself being angry, negative, resentful, or judgmental, do not think that you are in harmony with the Divine.
The issue of sexuality often comes up and I always find the same dilemma presented: If you all started to do what you wanted to do sexually, what would the world be like? If you take away all the rules, what will happen? The answer to this is where you and I part company. I have absolute confidence that if you were to drop your outer rules, you would find your own inner rules to be so much more humane, spontaneous, loving, and kind. I believe in you where you do not believe in yourself. You seem to think that you are like caged animals, and that if the cage were opened, the rules gone, you would become some kind of sexual beast. My friends, it is not like that. You are a part of the Createdness that carries with it an awareness of what is most beneficial should you choose to do it. But when you turn to a rule instead of to yourself, things become unclear. The law within your own being is absolutely predictable. I know that, because I know the Law upon which you rest. Do you not realize that you did not create yourself? You are a 'given' Creation! You have been given the wonder of you. There is a Law within you that you did not create, and which is absolutely dependable. It is much more dependable than any law that man has ever made. When you decide to trust your own Being, you will find there all the virtues that you have been seeking: compassion, understanding, harmony, courage, wisdom, all! Your own nature, your essence of Being, is part of the Source. Where do you think this raw material came from in the first place? In the moment of your creation, you were given incredible gifts; and one of the most important is the gift of sexuality!
You become confused when you move out into the world. You have certain feelings and emotions that you try to harmonize with other people. You have different opinions; you are different. If you wish to understand sexuality, do not view it with your thinking mind. You learn lessons from that Power when it is in motion. The energy itself is as pure as any energy that you could possibly imagine. The perversion comes in your mind. The Power rises, and the mind then takes over and makes judgments as to 'right' and 'wrong.' Ask yourself what purpose you use sexuality for. Some of you use your sexual power to manipulate other people; you become very 'good' at it, and use it to control, and some of you use your sexual power to punish other people; you become very 'bad' at it, and use it to control. Some of you don't use it at all.
If any power were to be placed in your hands, you would ask what to do with it, whom to share it with, how to affect your life with it. You cannot see your sexuality, but you can feel it as power within you and so you must ask these questions of yourself. What do you wish to use your sexuality for? That is an individual question which must be answered by each one of you in the deepest part of your Being. Do not be afraid to address that question, you will not become the wild animal that you fear. What you will find through a deep probing into the issue is the greatest ally the physical body has. You use allies from the so-called spirit world but I am talking about an ally that is right here. Sexuality is your ally because it gives you an opportunity to better understand yourself through being part of your own naturalness. And it takes a great deal of courage to become introspective enough to look at that area with honesty. Any one, no matter what their age, who has feelings of sexuality that are in some way distorted, or physical desires that make them unhappy or uncomfortable, should recognize them as areas of 'unfinished business.' If you do not have sexual expression in your life, it is because you have decided that you did not want it. When sexual desire is expressed, if it is in line with your beliefs, it will find a match. If you are sitting on your sexual power because you think you are too ugly, or too fat, or too old, or for whatever reason, then that is the belief you project into the world, and that is what you will experience. Some feel that avoiding the sexual issue entirely will solve their dilemma, only to find that it keeps reappearing. People sometimes have operations so that they will not have to deal with their sexuality, only to find that the energy is still present, still moving in their bodies. You are not going to get rid of the energy, for it is a part of the physical body. Sexuality can always he an ally because it is one of the strongest drives of the physical vehicle. Deal with it now, or deal with it next lifetime, but you will eventually have to face this issue. You need only clarify how you are going to use this great gift, and when you do, your life will begin to change. You will find that many of your experiences will be different. Things will enter your life that had not been present, and things will leave your life that have been in it. Your responsibility is to ask and answer the question-What do I wish to use this amazing power for?
I would like to be outrageous enough to suggest what might have been the Divine hope with regard to this power. Let us use an analogy. You have a teenager, and it comes time to give him or her a car-perhaps a Porsche, a wonderful and beautiful car. And as you present the keys, you are thinking, "Oh my God, oh my God!" because there is the awareness that incredible power can be used to take incredible chances and the teenager is so young. And so, when the Divine gifts of Power were bestowed, there was also a ringing in the consciousness, "Oh my God!" The hope was that the power might be used in different, conscious ways. One was for your pleasure! For the sheer wonder and pleasure of it. Another was to give you an awareness that power is, that it exists, and it moves, it creates, takes form, is dynamic and changeable. Can you think of any power, besides the power of your mind, that has that capacity? And finally, a higher use for this gift. There is gratitude, great gratitude for the physical pleasure, and gratitude for the feeling of being alive, of being more, more than the physical body. But after experiencing the pleasure, and the aliveness and the wonder of the feeling as it comes in from outside, and fills and moves you, is it not possible to see that same power as being reversible? Let me explain. You now feel sexual energy as coming to you, or arising within you. The hope was that one day you might see that it could also move in the other direction so that you could 'ride' that power back to the Source from which it came. Energy moves both ways, so if you could 'ride' it back, you would be connected with the Source from which that energy came!
There are many ways to do that, and there are no rules to riding that bridge back. The difficulty is that you all believe there are. You have all read the 'right' books, had the teachers, and have followed the 'right' path. Those of you who have had even a glimpse of the bridge now find yourself in a dilemma. And it has to do with your belief systems. Now you feel you are not qualified to ride that bridge back, or that in order to cross that bridge, you have to pay a toll. Therefore, you do not pay attention to the lessons that the sexual energy is trying to teach you every moment of your sexual experience. You 'leave'; you do not stay in that experience. Many things distract you. Guilt comes in; you feel that you should not be doing it, and you hope that God is not watching, or that your teacher is not watching. So you are 'not there,' you go on semi-automatic, and you fail to feel the wonder and the movement. Sexual energy is an ally, but no ally, no matter how powerful, can help you if you are not there, if you are not listening. You must be there, paying attention to everything that is going on, to your responses, your feelings, how the energy moves, how it liberates, where it is stuck, and what to do with it. If you are not there, you are lost and you have lost the teaching.
When you are not happy in your sexual life, many of you think that the answer is to add more people to your experience. Then, if you still have any energy left, you realize that you are still not happy -but have added a lot more trouble to your life, for now you have more egos to keep satisfied! Or you may decide that the trouble is with your present partner, that if you found a more sensual person you would be happy. So you find another partner only to discover that you still feel unfulfilled. Sexual energy will fulfill you only when it is used wisely on all levels. Anything short of that and you will remain unsatisfied because the energy was never meant to stop at any level of gratification.
How then, to open to these deeper experiences? Just as some of you sit in meditation, very aware of the energy patterns as they move through you, thereby learning that these energies are not of the limited self, so will the awareness of sexual energy bring you in touch with its 'triggering effect.' If you wish to use your sexual expression in such a way that it will nourish you on all levels, you will have to listen, and pay attention to what is happening inside and around you. You will have to become very quiet and very intense. You will need to be aware, and you will have to feel and come to know the movement of that energy. With observation, you will find that the genital area is very close to the trigger point of the kundalini. When your awareness is totally present, you will find that you have the ability to 'pull the power up' and to raise it from your lower chakra to your highest, igniting them all along the way.
If you do not feel the wonder of that power, it is because something in your mind has asked you to turn it off. Please understand that this energy does not flow in one direction only. You cannot separate, in a 'rod of power,' one end from the other, for they are joined. Sexuality is God's gift to you, and every gift that is given has been given for one main reason. It is to be used eventually for the journey 'home', to be used to come back to the Source. The teenager can take the car and the money, and do whatever he wants, but the parents hope he will eventually use them to drive home. It is no different with God. He allows you to go and play, and do all those wonderful things that you and the teenagers do; but eventually He hopes you will begin to realize that you are lonely and want to go 'home'. Do with the energy what you will, in whatever way you want, in whatever lifetime; but understand, it was given so that you could use it to make your way 'home'!
Are there any questions?
Q: I have understood that the 'kundalini' as power could be very dangerous, and to seek it one should have a teacher. Is this true?
If you are going to use various spiritual disciples such as long meditation, austerities, pranayama, etc., in order to 'get' this kundalini power, and insist that it rise at your command, then you will need a guide. Speaking from my own incarnative pattern, I can tell you that I did not have a guide, that I had no one around who had the slightest intimation of what I was trying to do. All I had was the movement of the energy itself. And I will tell you that it was absolutely reliable, it moved in its own way, in its own good time and it did not take me too fast, or too far, and everything was all right. When you let the energy lead the way, moving as it will, it creates its own pathway. It is like a small stream moving freely down a mountain. But if you break open a dam and release the energy all at once, the rush could be dangerous. Let it happen in its own good and wondrous time. Do not think that you need to have a teacher for everything. The teacher is you! That power is within you, and you do have a regulatory system. As the energy moves, it will clear the way. Do not take my word for it-but do not take anyone else's either; play fair and listen to yourself. Once you try it, you will find you do know something about your own energy, and you will not have to feel separated from your sexuality any more.
The purpose of sexual union is to nourish you on all levels. If you have a partner who is also interested in sexual understanding, I would suggest that you begin along these lines to investigate the source of that nourishment. Some of you may want to buy some books on Tantric Yoga, but you do not need to do that. Write your own book about your own sexual understanding. You be the laboratory and the subject. Let us suppose that you are at a party. Someone comes up to you, and you feel the sexual energy begin to rise. The disciplined one would at once ask, "Would it be useful to experience this energy now?" If you are on the lowest level of expression, the usefulness is obvious. Pleasure. So you go and do, or don't, as you choose. If you are on a higher level (I mistrust 'levels,' but aren't we having fun!), then you can say, "I will have to think about it, for to activate this now would create more chaos in my life, and it may or may not be worth it." If you decide it is worth it, then do it, if not, then don't and be prepared to accept the responsibility of your action. At the highest level you might ask, "Would this expression, under these circumstances, with this person, be maximum in my reaching Divine understanding or not?" In the end, you will learn something that you might not want to know; like attracts like. If you are on the lowest level only, it is unlikely that you will be attracted to someone on a higher level, for they will appear lacking in spontaneity to you. One step up is where you find the 'committed lovers,' who are not necessarily committed to higher awareness, but to each other. On the highest level you will find only those who are seeking to use everything in their universe to come Home.
Q: How does one move this energy?
Locate the power in a specific part of your body, then deepen your awareness of it by staying with it. Since you know that thought creates, you can consciously decide that you are going to bring it up through your body and so it begins to move. You do not have only seven chakras, as most of you tend to believe. There are many chakras located all over the body. When you begin to move the energy, these centers trigger each other to 'light up.' It is a movement in the synapses, and it is very rapid movement over which you have little control once it begins. Your job is to be aware of the energy, concentrate on it and your desire to move it up. Then allow it to move. The moment that you put your awareness on any area of your physical body, the energy will move there, so start with the lowest chakra and concentrate in turn on each of the others. This will move the energy up through and out of the crown chakra. Try it. And remember, this is one of the greatest gifts that you have been given! There were no rules made along with the gift; you have made them all for yourself. Just as you are responsible for the quality of your speech, for the quality of your actions, for the quality of everything in your life, so also are you responsible for the quality of your sexual activities. It is up to you. There is no 'wrong' and there is no 'right'; there is simply choice!
Q: Do we make rules around sexuality because we are afraid to go home'?
Sexual rules were made by people who did not feel free in their sexual expression. I am not talking about this modern age, but about the priests of old. They set themselves apart and decided that sex was an activity in which they should not indulge. The minute this rule was made it was imposed on others. When this happened, it became obvious that sexuality would end up with many restrictions. The rules were adhered to, even in the face of the fact that many people have become totally enlightened during the sexual union. The priests felt that if you did not Awaken by following the rules, then your experience was not valid, just like the prevalent medical belief that if you are healed by other than medical rules, there must have been a mistake in the original diagnosis. If you are following the religious rules, then credence is given to your 'enlightening' experience. Please do not believe that it was God who made the rules you follow. God does not make you do anything; and I tell you that much of what is going on is an experiment. Life is dynamic action in creation. What would be the point of God laying it al I out, and then you playing it according to a script? Life is an amazingly wonder-filled creation that is on-going, and you are part of it. And all that you think and say and do is a part of it. There are no 'mistakes'; there is nothing' wrong.' It is all Life.
And I have yelled long enough. Thank you all for coming.
Reprinted from "I Come As A Brother"